Mary’s story
Out of control & dissociated to clarity and calm.
Mary works as an independent consultant and runs her own business. She has a very busy work life and also has to make the time to run her home. Mary is a single mother with live at home adult sons. She values her independence, loves to travel, and shares her time with like-minded people.
Mary experienced a very difficult break up and divorce with her ex-husband. She found that she had been deceived in several different ways during her marriage. Although she had received counselling for what she had been working through there was deeper healing that she needed to find within.
Mary’s childhood had left her with some problems around connection with men. Some of this was related to the relationship with her father. She could often be left feeling rejected and felt that she needed to validate herself with relationships.
Mary felt dissociated and incomplete
Mary would find it very difficult to sit still feeling the urge to move constantly and feeling quite uncomfortable. She found that she was in a constant state of high alert, fight or flight, hypervigilance.
Mary found herself caught up in remote and in person relationships with men who could not meet her needs. She often found herself being ghosted or ignored and then felt rejected and let down by the experiences.
Mary was holding onto a lot of resentment which had been causing her to feel anxious and disassociated. She was unable to connect in with and understand what her true purpose was. She felt heavy, without energy and deeply sad.
To add to this she was feeling holding un-integrated grief around the loss of a baby son, and the loss of her father. All through this she also noticed that her mother had been relying on her, for all of her life, for emotional support.
Mary’s rage and resentment dissolved as self-love grew
Mary would sometimes feel uncontrollable anger, rage, and resentment at herself due to her people-pleasing tendencies. By connecting with her wounded child, she was able to acknowledge and feel the strong emotions when they arose. She was able to better understand what her needs really were, and now are.
Mary became very aware of the way that she used to tell herself off about so many things. As she began to observe this, through shadow work, she was able to soften these patterns and see when she was telling herself off and not allow it to grow into strong feelings within her.
“The breathwork is so powerful; I feel like I have let go of so much” Mary
Mary by acknowledging and finding ways of seeing her triggers, how she was reacting to certain things, was able to begin to find her “no”. She was able to put into place boundaries with herself and with other people. She stopped seeking external validation, often from men and deleted all the dating apps which had plagued her for so long.
Mary built more empathy for herself and was able to start to feel on a much deeper level how she felt about herself, developing a healthier and more appreciative relationship with herself.
“I have noticed how I am feeling so much lighter. I’ve just realised how happy I am” Mary
Mary has realised how much she enjoys being alone. She’s been able to understand her feelings of loneliness and that it’s only her that can fulfil herself. She’s let go of needing to find something or someone, on the external to complete her and has realised that she is whole and worthy on her own.
Through breathwork Mary has been able to unlock, release and integrate physical trauma which was held around grief and loss.
“I have found a place I never thought existed, I love myself” Mary
Mary has a new vision for herself, where she is running training courses from Bali.
Mary feels lighter, freer and whole
What will your new beginning be like?
